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John Sellars — Lessons in Stoicism: What Ancient Philosophers Teach Us About How to Live

Allen Lane (Penguin), 2019 · 96 pages · ISBN 9780141990040

A concise guide to Stoic practice built on one central question: what do you actually control? The answer — your judgements — reorganizes everything else: happiness, emotion, time, and your concern with other people’s opinions.


The core idea: the dichotomy of control

What aspects of your life do you really control? Do you control whether you get ill or not? Do you ever decide to be involved in an accident? Can you stop your loved ones dying? Can you guarantee your own worldly success?

Questions such as these were a central preoccupation of the Stoics.

All we have complete control over are our judgements, which is to say what we think about the things that happen to us.

Judgements happen fast

Judgements are fundamental, and we neglect them at our peril — but we often make them so swiftly that we don’t even notice we are doing anything. We might judge so quickly that something is good, and do it so often, that we start to assume that the thing in question just is good in itself.

Don't outsource your happiness

If you make your happiness dependent on a romantic relationship, a career ambition, material possessions or a certain physical appearance, you have effectively handed over your happiness to the whims of something or someone else. If you think you control these things when you don’t, frustration and disappointment are almost guaranteed.

Aim at effort, not outcome

  • We can strive to act as best as we can, but we can never completely control the outcome.
  • If we tie our happiness to achieving the outcome, we run the risk of being frequently disappointed.
  • If we make our goal simply doing the best we can, then nothing can get in our way.

Philosophy as daily practice

Morning and evening reflection

  • Morning reflection: prepare the day ahead in advance.
  • Seneca outlines a process of evening reflection: go over your day — what you did well, where your attention may have slipped, and how you might do better tomorrow.
  • Epictetus goes even further: like the mariner sailing the ship, we must remain focused every single moment of the day, prepared for whatever might happen next. Keep key philosophical principles always ready to hand, so we don’t fall back into mistaken judgements. This is philosophy as a daily practice and a way of life.

The Stoic emotional ideal

Not emotional detachment

We’ll still have the usual reactions to events — we’ll jump, flinch, get momentarily frightened or embarrassed, cry — and we’ll still have strong caring relationships with those close to us. What we won’t develop are the negative emotions: anger, resentment, bitterness, jealousy, obsession, perpetual fear or excessive attachment. These are the things that can ruin a life.

Living in accordance with Nature

The lesson here is that we are but parts of Nature, subject to its greater forces and inevitably swept along by its movements — and we shall never be able to enjoy a harmonious life until we fully comprehend this.


Two Stoic lessons on time and opinion

Don’t waste your life

Seneca says that, for many of us, by the time we are really ready to start living, our lives are almost over. It’s not that our lives are too short; the problem is that we waste so much time. We procrastinate, pursue things of little or no value, or wander aimlessly through life with no clear focus. Some people strive for success so they can be wealthy enough to buy luxury goods that will end up discarded in a rubbish bin long before their lives are done.

Stop caring what others think

  • First of all we should stop worrying about what others think.
  • Don’t try to impress others; don’t pursue their favour in order to secure some advantage.
  • Too many people care about what others think of them, but pay little attention to their own thoughts. They sacrifice their time to others but rarely…

Selected highlights

“All we have complete control over are our judgements, which is to say what we think about the things that happen to us.”

“If we make our goal simply doing the best we can, then nothing can get in our way.”

“It’s not that our lives are too short; the problem is that we waste so much time.”